Dear Mom: I thought of you last night. I got home from work to an empty house and turned on the TV and saw that The Little Couple was on. Reruns. So I watched 3 episodes to catch up. They adopted the cutest 3 year old boy from China. I remember how much you loved that show and wanted you to know. They are happy. Yes, I know that when kids are small they have small problems and when they get big they have big problems. How could I forget? – it was one of your frequent flyers.
Oh, and the Giants aren’t looking too good this preseason. Yes, I know it is only preseason and no, I’m not turning into a fair weather fan. I’ll be a fan for life and I’ll keep you posted.
Andy is still in training and won’t learn where he’ll be placed until the fall. We are hoping he stays with us but he has to go wherever the job takes him. See first paragraph for reference!
Ugh. I cannot find your sewing box. And no, we did not throw it out. I needed a needle and thread for a card I was making but poof we cannot find it. Yes, I remember when Mike threw out your partial false teeth bridge, but you left it wrapped in a Kleenex on the kitchen counter and I absolutely did not throw out the sewing box. Meh, maybe Mike did but he is denying it. I’ll keep looking. By the way, I saved the row of sequins that were left over from when you made my wedding dress. I thought about putting them on cards, but decided to just let them be. Gorgeous. The dress and your making it. Thanks.
Oops. Got to go! Love, Joan
Showing posts with label Dear Mom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dear Mom. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Monday, July 8, 2013
Dear Mom: The List
Dear Mom,
It's been 5 months since you died. I used to think about the time when my life would not be wrapped up in taking care of you. I had plans. Those plans got me through some rough moments. I made lists in my head waiting in the icy cold ER for whatever test results were taking so long. Lots of lists. Fun lists that I could not tackle because I was so very busy making you Ensure milkshakes and counting out your pills.
So now I'm not making those milkshakes anymore, but I still have the lists. I have not traveled, signed up for aquatic exercise, taken that watercolor class, opened an Etsy shop, read books, or gone out for dinner after work. (Ok, I read one book.)
I come home and crash and think about everything I want to do but don't because it is too expensive and then there will be no money to retire or maybe the parking lot is too far from the class and it will be dark when it lets out and then maybe it is dangerous. No matter that it is summer and light until 9 and a perfectly lit parking lot in a safe area or that I've been saving for retirement for a very long time. Nope, nothing is safe. It is all just one big scary risky thing. Better to watch Housewives and think about the list.
I did manage to find the time to check online about why my finger nails have these ridges now and saw that it is a "sign of aging." I have a lot of those signs. You were right. Getting old isn't pretty. But it is what is left. Watching my nails develop ridges while I click on the remote isn't working out.
And there are no Ensure milkshakes to blame anymore. Just the inside the head junk that found too much room to grow. I'm working on getting rid of the junk and doing things. Yes, I know your first thought will be negative -- yes, I know I might fail. Let's just stop thinking that way and take a chance. Because it didn't take that much time to make those milkshakes. There was time then and there is time now.
I'll let you know how it's going.
Love, Joan
It's been 5 months since you died. I used to think about the time when my life would not be wrapped up in taking care of you. I had plans. Those plans got me through some rough moments. I made lists in my head waiting in the icy cold ER for whatever test results were taking so long. Lots of lists. Fun lists that I could not tackle because I was so very busy making you Ensure milkshakes and counting out your pills.
So now I'm not making those milkshakes anymore, but I still have the lists. I have not traveled, signed up for aquatic exercise, taken that watercolor class, opened an Etsy shop, read books, or gone out for dinner after work. (Ok, I read one book.)
I come home and crash and think about everything I want to do but don't because it is too expensive and then there will be no money to retire or maybe the parking lot is too far from the class and it will be dark when it lets out and then maybe it is dangerous. No matter that it is summer and light until 9 and a perfectly lit parking lot in a safe area or that I've been saving for retirement for a very long time. Nope, nothing is safe. It is all just one big scary risky thing. Better to watch Housewives and think about the list.
I did manage to find the time to check online about why my finger nails have these ridges now and saw that it is a "sign of aging." I have a lot of those signs. You were right. Getting old isn't pretty. But it is what is left. Watching my nails develop ridges while I click on the remote isn't working out.
And there are no Ensure milkshakes to blame anymore. Just the inside the head junk that found too much room to grow. I'm working on getting rid of the junk and doing things. Yes, I know your first thought will be negative -- yes, I know I might fail. Let's just stop thinking that way and take a chance. Because it didn't take that much time to make those milkshakes. There was time then and there is time now.
I'll let you know how it's going.
Love, Joan
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